Marital Problems

How Brain SPECT Imaging Can Help with Marital Problems

Whenever There Is Relationship Trouble Think About the Brain

• Chronic arguing or fighting

• Someone always says no

• Impulsivity, addictions, bad behavior

• Anxiety, depression, oppositional behavior

• Changes in behavior

• Failed couples counseling

• Abuse ““ verbal, physical, sexual

• Prevention

• Pre-screening couples

Marriage can be hard. It tends to be much more successful when the brains of both partners function in a healthy way. Placing the brain in the center of the marital relationship is key to having the best relationship. According to a 2005 New York Times article, two years after ending counseling, 25 percent of couples were worse off than when they started, and after four years up to 38 percent were divorced. Very few marital therapists ever consider looking at the brain in trying to help failing relationships, but that is a mistake.

For example, I want to tell you about a couple who FAILED marital therapy. That’s right, their therapist gave them an F. Now, how do you fail marital therapy? Well, after spending three years and over $25,000, the therapist told them to get divorced. This made the couple very upset, because they wanted to be married. When the couple strongly protested, the therapist got nervous and told them that she knew a doctor who takes care of really difficult people and sent them to the Amen Clinic.

As part of our evaluations, we perform brain scans; we look at how our patients’ brains work. The husband’s brain looked awful. Below you will see two brain SPECT scans. The scan on the left is of a healthy person. The scan on the right is the husband’s scan. The Swiss cheese appearance indicates seriously low overall activity, the same pattern we often see in our drug or alcohol abusers. But the scan didn’t fit his history, because he said he didn’t drink and had never used drugs. Now, I know that drug and alcohol abusers often lie, so, in front of his wife, I asked the husband again if he drank much alcohol or used drugs. He said, “Dr. Amen, I have many problems, but that is not it.”

So, I turned to the wife and asked if that was true. “Yes, Dr. Amen, he doesn’t drink and he has never done drugs. He is just a jerk.” I chuckled at her comment. But in my mind, I wondered why his scan looked so awful. I went through the list in my head of potential causes: brain infections, a near drowning episode, low thyroid or environmental toxins. My next question to the husband was,

“Where do you work?” He said, “I work in a furniture factory.”

“What do you do?” I asked.

“I finish furniture all day long.” He was doing drugs. In fact, he was doing one of the worst drugs for the brain: inhaling organic solvents.

My next question was to the wife. “When did he become a jerk?”

She said, “What do you mean?”

I said, “Did you marry him that way? Do you have father issues that you are trying to work out?”

“No,” she said. “When we first got married he was great. It wasn’t until about 5 years ago that we started having trouble.” Then she put her hand over her mouth and said, “Oh my, that was about the time he started this job. Do you think his personality change can be from his job?”

“Yes,” I answered. “Something is damaging his brain, making it hard for him to be a good husband.”

The first intervention was to stop the toxic fumes. I had him transferred to another place in the company where he was not exposed to solvents, and put him on a brain healthy program. With the right treatment, his behavior got better as did their marriage.

I wonder how many marriages are suffering because one partner has a brain problem that no one is aware of. How do you do marital therapy with this brain? It will never work, until you change his brain.

Healthy		Failed Marital Therapy: Toxic