11 Ways to Avoid a Toxic or Stressful Holiday Season
Table of Contents
11 Ways to Avoid a Toxic or Stressful Holiday Season
We are knee-deep in the holiday season. For some, this is great news, but for others, a dreadful, stressful time. The stress of family gatherings with toxic relatives, the financial pressure of buying gifts, and navigating busy crowds can wreak havoc on our brains and bodies, mentally, emotionally, and physically.
For some people, even so much as anticipating get-togethers, gift-giving, or company parties can change body chemistry and raise stress hormones, such as cortisol levels. Holiday stress can cause your brain and body to fall out of sync, leaving you emotionally drained and tense.
Even so, awareness is the beginning of change. Can you tell when holiday stress is starting to take a toll on your mind? What can you do to keep your balance through it all? And how can a brain-body approach help you rediscover calm and joy this season? Let’s help you find your calm amid this holiday’s chaos.
The stress of family gatherings with toxic relatives, the financial pressure of buying gifts, and navigating busy crowds can wreak havoc on our brains and bodies. A brain-based approach can help you rediscover calm and joy.
WHAT ARE THE COMMON SIGNS OF HOLIDAY STRESS AND TOXICITY?
Holiday stress can sneak up on you, but as the pressure builds, your body will start sending subtle warning signs. You may be asking, what are the signs of holiday stress and toxicity? Here is what to watch out for:
- Low energy and fatigue. You might be sleepy throughout the day and have no drive to keep up with a busy schedule. If you’ve ruled out other reasons for fatigue, it could be connected to internal toxic energy.
- Impatience and irritability. Lines are long in the market, and you feel yourself getting tense and emotionally charged if people are moving slowly. You have little to no patience and find yourself wanting to lecture others for “bad” behavior.
- Anxiety and depression. A study conducted by the National Alliance on Mental Illness reported that 64 percent of people with diagnosed mental illnesses said their symptoms were worse during the holidays.
If you are not clinically diagnosed with an anxiety disorder or depression, you might find that you feel some of the symptoms of one or both during this hectic and possibly toxic time.
Strained relationships can stir up unresolved emotions, making gatherings exhausting instead of joyful. Constant busyness, from planning, shopping, and social events can drain your mental energy. Again, overstimulation from lights, noise, and activity overwhelms your senses and raises stress hormones like cortisol.
HOW DOES HOLIDAY STRESS AFFECT YOUR BRAIN AND BODY?
As holiday anxiety mounts, your brain releases stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. High levels of cortisol can disrupt your brain’s communication pathways, affect your concentration, and impair your memory.
When elevated, cortisol can also shrink the areas of your brain responsible for emotional regulation. Physically, this can increase inflammation and weaken your immune system.
Financial worry, family conflicts and overcrowding can keep your brain constantly on alert. The combination of physical exhaustion and emotional strain can make it harder for you to stay calm, think clearly and experience genuine joy.
HOW CAN YOU SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES TO PROTECT YOUR MENTAL WELLNESS?
Communicate your needs with kindness and honesty. Use statements like “I’d like to have some quiet time tonight” to help others understand your limits without guilt. Say no when you feel drained or overwhelmed.
Saying yes to every request, can cause resentment or force you to spread yourself too thin and cancel your commitment at the last minute.
Effective boundary setting isn’t about shutting people out. It’s an important part of learning how to avoid holiday stress that helps protect your energy. Effective boundaries help you connect more meaningfully with those you love.
Related: 6 People-Pleasing Behaviors to Avoid During the Holidays
WHY IS MEDITATION A POWERFUL TOOL DURING THE HOLIDAYS?
One of the most effective holiday stress tips is embracing meditation. A 2017 study showed that practicing mindfulness meditation can significantly improve your mood. Use a guided meditation to help you focus and stay present if needed.
Make a daily routine of closing your eyes, focusing on your breath, and being still for even a few minutes throughout your day. It can calm your nervous system by lowering your cortisol levels. Meditation can also increase your dopamine and serotonin levels, which are needed to boost your focus.
HOW CAN EXERCISE HELP YOU STAY GROUNDED IN A BUSY SEASON?
Gentle forms of movement allow your body to release tension without adding physical strain. If your schedule feels packed, try a ten-minute morning walk, dancing while you cook, or just a few minutes of yoga.
Exercise during a stressful holiday season can cause a decrease in depression and anxiety according to research. It stimulates a release of feel-good chemicals in your brain that help clear your mind and calm your nervous system.
HOW DO COMPASSION AND MINDSET PLAY A ROLE IN REDUCING HOLIDAY TOXICITY?
During a toxic holiday season, compassion can help you stay grounded. While it might not seem easy or even possible, try to accept and feel love for the people in your life.
If someone is particularly toxic or your dynamic is unhealthy, then it could be time to sever ties, but in less extreme cases and with the public at large, take a breath and remember that people are sometimes difficult to communicate with and other times loving, funny, and thoughtful
Let the small stuff go as best you can. Beware of toxic perfectionism, where you might set unrealistic goals, be very hard on yourself, or feel underlying shame about past behavior that motivates you to be “good” all of the time.
Related: The Trouble with Toxic Perfectionism
HOW SHOULD YOU APPROACH ALCOHOL AND SOCIAL EVENTS MINDFULLY?
A study examining the effects of chronic alcohol consumption at low to moderate amounts showed decreases in grey and white matter in the brain and brain shrinkage.
Additionally, alcohol lowers the ability to think clearly and make sound choices and can lead to more toxic interactions with others. Find new mocktails or infused water to make, and remember, it’s always OK to stay hydrated by sipping on water at a holiday party!
WHAT CONVERSATION TOPICS CAN KEEP GATHERINGS NON-TOXIC?
Neutral conversation and asking people question about themselves can help you manage holiday stress and keep get-togethers non-toxic.
If someone else brings up a contentious political topic, set a boundary such as “I’m going to keep our conversation to things other than politics” and ask about their children, pets, job, favorite sports team, hobby, or next vacation.
WHAT CREATIVE GIFT-GIVING IDEAS EASE FINANCIAL PRESSURE AND STRESS?
Financial stress can directly affect your brain health as it triggers the release of stress hormones like cortisol. This can impair your focus, emotional regulation, and memory. Offer loving acts such as babysitting, dog sitting, or making healthy treats. Plan a special day outdoors, go to a museum, make a music playlist, or write a meaningful letter to those you love.
WHY IS CARVING OUT SOLITUDE IMPORTANT, EVEN DURING HOLIDAY CHAOS?
Whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, solitude is an important way to recharge and get quiet. Solitude can increase self-connection, a sense of autonomy, and self-reliance.
Quiet time during holidays can reduce your sensory overload and the stress hormone levels, which is crucial for the recovery of your brain and nervous system.
HOW CAN BREATHWORK BRING RELIEF IN IMMEDIATE MOMENTS OF OVERWHELM?
Diaphragmatic breathing is a great breathing exercise to try, as it’s breathing from your belly, through your nose, and out through your mouth. Getting more oxygen into our bloodstream is extremely beneficial to slow down racing thoughts, regulate mood, and reset an overall state of being from stressed to relaxed.
WHAT OVERALL BRAIN-BODY STRATEGY CAN YOU FOLLOW FOR A HEALTHIER HOLIDAY SEASON?
A truly healthy holiday requires balance. Nurture a compassionate mindset, practice mindfulness, set clear boundaries and stay active.
Reflect on the ideas that resonate most with you, then pick 1 or 2 strategies to start today. If your holiday stress becomes too heavy to handle, remember, professional support is always available.
FINAL TAKEAWAY ON AVOIDING HOLIDAY STRESS
The holiday season doesn’t have to drain you. With a few intentional practices like setting healthy boundaries, you can move through this season with resilience.
If the stress becomes unbearable or you find yourself feeling stuck, just remember that Amen Clinics offers a compassionate, brain-based approach, meant to help you understand what’s really going on in your brain and guide you toward lasting emotional wellbeing and balance.
HAPPIER HOLIDAYS TO YOU!
The great news is that you don’t have to dread the holidays. Give yourself the gift of prioritizing your mental well-being. By caring for your brain and reaching out for professional support, if needed, you can protect your mood, enjoy more peace, and create meaningful moments that truly matter.
FAQ About Holiday Stress
1. What causes the most holiday stress?
Holiday stress often comes from unrealistic expectations, family conflicts, financial strain, and overscheduling.
The brain’s stress response (including elevated cortisol levels) can be triggered by too many commitments, unresolved emotions, or sensory overload. Learning to set boundaries and simplify your schedule can significantly reduce this stress.
2. How can I calm my mind when I start to feel overwhelmed during the holidays?
Start by taking slow, deep breaths to activate your body’s relaxation response. Short mindfulness breaks, walks outdoors, or brief meditations can also reset your nervous system. Focusing on gratitude and using positive self-talk helps your brain shift away from stress and anxiety.
3. When should I seek professional help for holiday stress or anxiety?
If your stress feels unmanageable causing sleep issues, persistent sadness, irritability, or physical symptoms it may be time to reach out for professional support. A brain-based evaluation at Amen Clinics can help uncover underlying causes of stress or mood changes and create a personalized plan to restore balance.
Amen Clinics
Founded in 1989 by double-board certified psychiatrist and neuroscientist Daniel G. Amen, MD, Amen Clinics Inc. (ACI) is known as the best brain and mental health company in the world. Our clinical staff includes over 50 healthcare specialists, including adult and child psychiatrists, integrative (functional) medicine physicians, naturopaths, addiction specialists, forensic psychiatrists, geriatric psychiatrists, nutritionists, licensed therapists, and more. Our clinicians have all been hand-selected and personally trained by Dr. Amen, whose mission is to end mental illness by creating a revolution in brain health. Over the last 35-plus years, ACI has built the world’s largest database of functional brain scans—over 250,000 SPECT scans on patients from 155 countries—related to how people think, feel, and behave.
References
- National Alliance on Mental Illness. (2014, November 19). Mental health and the holiday blues [Press release]. https://www.nami.org/Press-Media/Press-Releases/2014/Mental-health-and-the-holiday-blues
- Luu, K., & Hall, P. A. (2017). Examining the acute effects of Hatha yoga and mindfulness meditation on executive function and mood. Mindfulness, 8(3), 873–880. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-016-0661-2
- Verbaten, M. N. (2009). Chronic effects of low to moderate alcohol consumption on structural and functional properties of the brain: Beneficial or not? Human Psychopharmacology: Clinical & Experimental, 24(3), 199-205. https://doi.org/10.1002/hup.1022
- Saeed, S. A., Cunningham, K., & Bloch, R. M. (2019). Depression and anxiety disorders: Benefits of exercise, yoga, and meditation. American Family Physician, 99(10), 620-627. Retrieved from https://www.aafp.org/pubs/afp/issues/2019/0515/p620.html?cmpid=em_AFP_20190318
