7 Secrets To Improving Your Relationships
Do you know people who see every situation in a bad light? Or someone who struggles with feelings of sadness, lack of motivation, or hopelessness? If so, they could be experiencing troubles with the functioning of the limbic system in their brain.
The limbic system, also called the emotional brain, lies near the center of the brain. Considering its size – about that of a walnut – it is packed with functions critical for human behavior and survival. The limbic system processes our sense of smell, stores highly charged emotional memories, and affects sleep and appetite cycles, moods, sexuality, and bonding.
When the limbic system is less active there is generally a positive, more hopeful state of mind. When it is heated up, or overactive, negativity can take over.
Problems with the functioning of the limbic system can result in:
- Clinical depression
- Increased negative thinking
- Negative perception of events
- Flood of negative emotions, such as hopelessness, helplessness, and guilt
- Appetite and sleep problems
- Decreased or increased sexual responsiveness
- Social isolation
It has been shown that enhancing emotional bonds between people will help heal the limbic system. How you get along with other people can either help or hurt your limbic system! The better you get along with those around you, the better you will feel.
I teach my patients the following seven principles to help keep their relationships healthy and rewarding:
1. Take responsibility for keeping your important relationships strong.
Don’t be the type of person who blames other people for the problems in your life. It will take you down the rabbit hole of victimhood. Take responsibility for making your key relationships better and look for ways to improve them today. If you do this, your relationships will improve almost immediately.
2. Never take relationships for granted.
They need to be constantly nurtured, like plants need water.
3. Protect your relationship.
A surefire way to doom a relationship is to discount, belittle, or degrade other people. Protect your relationships by building those people up.
4. Clarify any hurts early.
Whenever there is a question of motivation or intention, check with them about their behavior or motives. You cannot read other people’s minds.
5. Notice what you like more than what you don’t.
It’s very easy to notice what you do not like about a relationship, but when you spend more time noticing the positive aspects of the relationship, you’re more likely to see an increase in positive behavior.
6. Maintain and protect trust.
So many relationships fall apart after there has been a major violation of trust, such as an affair or other form of dishonesty. Once a violation has occurred, try to understand why it happened.
7. Deal with difficult issues.
Whenever you give in to another person to avoid a fight, you give away a little bit of your power. If you do this over time, you give away a lot of power and begin to resent the relationship. Avoiding conflict in the short run often has devastating long-term effects. In a firm but kind way, stick up for what you think is right. It will help keep the relationship balanced.
You CAN change your brain, and change your life…and we at Amen Clinics want to help you. Call us today at 888-288-9834 or visit our website to learn more or schedule an appointment.