3 Simple Steps to Be More Resilient in Any Awful Situation

3 Simple Steps to Be More Resilient in Any Awful Situation

Do you feel like you’re cracking under the stress? When did you start losing it? Was it when the pandemic hit? When the lockdown dragged on and on? When the economic devastation took root? Or when the social unrest exploded? For many of us, our ability to cope with the multiple traumas of these uncertain times went out the window at some point.


Why You Might be Cracking from the Stress

What makes some people able to cope with the most abominable situations while others struggle? Researchers have found that in high-stress situations, people who can’t weather the storm typically believe 3 things:

  • The situation is permanent.
  • The situation is global.
  • You have no control over the situation.

With the current pandemic and the ensuing fallout, plus the protests over social injustice, there is a lot of this type of thinking going on.

You may fear the threat of illness or death from COVID-19 will always be with us and that the economy will never recover. The pandemic, as well as the social unrest, have already spread worldwide, and you may be worried things will never go back to normal. And you may be feeling like you’re utterly powerless to change the situation.

This ramps up stress and anxiety and makes you feel hopeless. That’s when you lose it.

The Power of TLC in the Face of Trauma

Researchers have discovered that people who are more resilient in the most desperate times tend to believe in TLC. This is a strategy that flips your thinking to help you calm stress and anxiety and feel more hopeful about the future.

Here’s what TLC stands for:

  • Temporary: Seeing the situation as temporary.
  • Local: Seeing the situation as local.
  • Control: Believing you have some control over the situation.

In terms of our current environment, here’s how TLC can help you cope.

Temporary: The coronavirus pandemic will not last forever. Think about all the pandemics from the past—the Spanish Influenza, bubonic plague, and cholera, for example. They all eventually resolved. This will pass too. And every time our economy has dipped into a recession, it has rebounded. The same goes for social unrest, which has already calmed down in most areas of the country.

Local: Although COVID-19 cases have been reported worldwide, the illness has not hit every street in every neighborhood in every city in every country of the world. According to the latest statistics, there have been over 9 million confirmed cases worldwide and over 473,000 deaths. Those are certainly heartbreaking numbers, but remember that there are 7.7 billion people on earth, which means the vast majority of people have not developed the virus.

Control: Always remember that you can control your own behavior and thought processes. Focus on what you can control and understand that the solutions for health and wellness lie in 4 circles—biological, psychological, social, and spiritual.

  • In the biological circle, this means washing your hands frequently, but it also means eating right, exercising, getting adequate sleep, and shoring up your immune system with vitamins D and C and zinc.
  • In the psychological circle, you need to practice mental hygiene and disinfect your thoughts. Your head may be filled with ANTs (automatic negative thoughts) that lie to you and making you feel anxious, angry, stressed, and depressed. Every time you feel mad, sad, nervous, or out of control, write down what you’re thinking and ask yourself if it is true.
  • In the social circle, you need to know what you want out of life and if your behavior is helping you or hurting you. It’s also important to connect with people—safely—who help you become the best version of yourself.
  • In the spiritual circle, think about why you are on this planet and consider giving back in some way to help your community.

No matter how awful a situation is, if you believe in and practice TLC, you can strengthen your resilience to get through it.

Anxiety, panic attacks, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, and other mental health issues can’t wait. During these uncertain times, your mental well-being is more important than ever and waiting until life gets back to “normal” is likely to make your symptoms worsen over time.

At Amen Clinics, we’re here for you. We offer in-clinic brain scanning and appointments, as well as mental telehealth, remote clinical evaluations, and video therapy for adults, children, and couples. Find out more by speaking to a specialist today at 888-288-9834. If all our specialists are busy helping others, you can also schedule a time to talk.

If you find this information helpful, please pass it on. Share it with your friends and family on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, or wherever you connect with the people you care about.


  1. Ppl. R losing patience, r not self controlling, not being hygienic enough, u ask why? Just watch the protesters. As far as I have learned, we only get one go around on this earth, and our young r forgetting that ! There r some good humans on earth, why can’t we march for them?

    Comment by Suzanne e graham — July 6, 2020 @ 2:59 AM

  2. Thank you for today’s reading I needed to see it…..

    Comment by Mary — July 6, 2020 @ 5:41 AM

  3. T = Life and it’s challenges are not temporary…We (a mother and father) should teach their children that life is not one endless party. Life will never be easy but it is simple…Trust in God…Live as if you are making a positive difference in everyone you meet. The current virus challenge may subside but another will follow. Perhaps instead of studying the brain, as parents and responsible adults we end attempting to fill it with worthless materialistic nonsense…Read history, in the entire spectrum of recorded life on earth it has been one endless fight for existence…That’s life…build your foundation on God, family and self-resolve…

    L = In today’s electronic society nothing is local…At the flick of a button our world is influenced by something many miles away…We have destroyed the legal immigration system, destroyed any academic rigor in the educational system, destroyed the family structure, and unleashed lawlessness in the guise of social equality…That’s not local…it’s the transformation of the new United States of America…

    C = Control is absent any rule or regulation that counters the relativistic mantra…If it feels good do it… If any person has a ‘spiritual’ circle influencing the mindless toddies, it is more than likely is anchored in some ‘new age’, tattoo fostered belief, promoted by a drug induced Hollywood type. Many could care less who they are hurting because they care nothing for themselves…Why do you believe they would care for humanity?

    The virus is not the major problem rotting away the soul of our country…It’s the destruction of the greatness embodied in the Founding Fathers resolve in building this country premised on One Country Under God…

    My apology for comments adverse to selling brain pictures…and yes, as someone who has served the country, studied hard to achieve, continued to believe in faith and family and our great country…I do believe my resiliency is tested daily but continue to have a trust in God. and my fellow citizens of all races, religions and nationalities…For me it’s…His will be done, not mine…

    I realize this will not be posted…it doesn’t follow the advertisement protocol…At least the gatekeeper will see it and perhaps realize the sanity of truth…Peace…

    Comment by Dr. Henry Sinopoli — July 6, 2020 @ 7:33 AM

  4. Totally agree we need to hear the hard truth. All I can say excellent message and Amen.

    Comment by Ingeborg Johnson — July 6, 2020 @ 9:40 AM

  5. I watched the protesters and I applaud them! Mostly peaceful, wearing masks. If I was 20 years younger, I’d probably be throwing bricks …

    It doesn’t matter one bit how many times we “go around on this earth”, we need to ensure that ALL people do WELL, have health care, have their civil rights, have the funds to live their lives benevolent.

    “There r some good humans on earth, why can’t we march for them?”

    We are. There are MANY Black people who I’d consider “good.” And the ones that aren’t, need help.

    If we only had universal healthcare and covered the Amen Clinics brain imaging and treatment, we’d be living in a much more peaceful and less violent country.

    Comment by Christine — July 6, 2020 @ 9:55 AM

  6. Throwing bricks is unlawful, and damaging someone properties is not right. You have to learn value and respect your neighbor as well as someone else business. They acquired with a lot of sacrifice to live better and you, who gave you the authority to throw bricks. Love your neighbor as yourself and then change for the best will come. You need to have God in your life.

    Comment by Iván — July 6, 2020 @ 12:54 PM

  7. Thanks for the article.
    To those who state platitudes in saying how change can happen so peacefully or through prayer, I would ask you to give an example of real, desperately needed change that happened in that way. Meaningful change often happens through war. I would ask you to consider our National Anthem, which speaks of the War of 1812. Patriotically you sing (or try to, LOL) about war. The Revolutionary War brought about our democratic nation. Had we simply prayed and stayed calm, we would be a part of the United Kingdom at this point. So pray all you like. God gave you a mind so you can use it for more than prayer.

    It’s easy enough for white or even many brown people to say that everyone should just calm down. Right. Because you have privilege that black people have never had. Never. Things have not improved for black people over the past several decades of peacefulness. Well, with the exception of police officers unloading guns into the bodies of black men. So if you were a black individual, how would you think change will happen?

    As for disrespect for property and violence, that behavior has actually been done by a small percentage of folks on the streets. The overwhelming majority of protesters are doing so peacefully. And when the police and military have backed down, the amount of violence has decreased, not increased. If you can only see the violence and not the overwhelming beauty of folks exercising their First (not Second in this case) Amendment, then you have some cognitive reframing to do.

    To all, take care!

    Comment by Kerri South — July 6, 2020 @ 2:37 PM

  8. A question in a scenario.
    You are going to the Post Office.
    You wear a mask to keep potential Coronavirus 19 from spreading.
    You touch the corona virus infected door handle to enter the Post Office.
    Without thinking you touch your mask.
    The mask is now infected with coronavirus.
    You inhale (breathe in) and the virus gets in your nose.
    You exhale (breathe out) and the virus blows off your mask.
    You exit and again touch the door, then touch your mask, you get a double dose of virus. you leave the mask on because you are now going to the grocery store, you keep breathing in the virus. Does this sound safe to the person wearing the mask?

    Comment by Lola Jorgensen — July 7, 2020 @ 7:56 AM

  9. All living things upon this earth is precious. The two leggeds, four leggeds, beasts of the air and waters. All things green and flourishing. Every creation was designed with careful consideration and blessed. There is none greater than nor less than. One needs to honor creation since it was designed by a loving Creator that deemed ALL to be worthy of manifestation. See each other as this Creator sees you-beautiful and magnificent. Once you have this concept of your perfect design, no matter your appearance, belief systems, socioeconomic status, education, etc., you will see there is no reason to hurt or destroy, raise a gun or fist, curse or hate. All weapons are discarded. All hurtful words are dissolved. You are left with two arms to embrace your brothers and sisters. Kind words to encourage. Acceptance of your differences. And Peace, like a river,that flows across our great planet. I am reminded of an old song from the sixties that goes: United we stand, divided, we fall. And if we ever have our backs against the wall, we’ll be together, forever, you and I. Thereinlies our greatest Strength!

    Comment by Lolita Kuyper — July 7, 2020 @ 3:44 PM

  10. This was a great reminder of how we as individuals and a collective are United as One with the Holy Spirit…✨

    Certain comments represent the separateness of individuals not just from their community or Self but from God.

    When there is any negativity one is separate. When there is positivity there is Love and that frequency is our birthright and connection to our truth, and most importantly, His love, God’s love is always there.

    We were given Wisdom and free will. It’s the latter that gets us in conflict and running from one hamster wheel to the next.

    I am so grateful to Dr. Amens clinic and diagnosis of PTSD without it I’m not sure how I would be handling today or any day.

    I try to live moment by moment, day by day and to assist others in THEIR OWN healing through the Holy Spirit. As I AM just a conduit.

    Believe what you will as those are your own mind thoughts and ultimate illusion of reality, especially if they are negative.

    That is not how or why we were created.

    Yes, it’s a struggle some days. STOP and go within, smell the roses even if you don’t have any. Create your environment filled with what the article mentions, surrounding yourself with what supports you positively and lovingly. If you don’t know what that is, seek guidance from someone or a place that makes you feel good, supported, safe and trustworthy.

    That you Dr. Amen for supporting me and my health.

    In gratitude,
    Anne K Ross
    Spiritual Life Coach and Energy Healer

    Comment by Anne — July 8, 2020 @ 8:36 AM

  11. Amen! Life isn’t Simple-Following God is! And what about “Do unto others…”

    Comment by J — July 13, 2020 @ 5:35 AM

  12. Gentle lady, “Because you have privilege that black people have never had”? In the large city in the deep south where my family has lived for 8 generations, we have a black mayor, a black police chief, a black fire marshal and a black sheriff. Have you never heard of affirmative action and the quota system in which a black person who may not even have as good as credentials that a white person applying for the same job has will be automatically hired? If as you say “things have not improved over the past several decades of peacefulness”, why does our major world class university hospital have so many black doctors and nurses? Why is it easier for a black person to be accepted to law school, medical school and veterinary school in our state? ” You say “Well with the exception of police officers unloading guns into the bodies of black men”? We have an inordinate number of even black police officers in our state being killed by “black thugs”. Your saying that “as for the disrespect for property and violence, that behavior has actually been done ab a small percentage of folks of the streets” is rediculous. How much does the mayor of Minneapolis want FEMA to pay because of this “damage done by a “small percentage” of folks on the streets? What the mayor of Seattle called a “block party” where a 6 square block of the city was held by anarchists apparently is okay with you. Thank you for finishing with your statement that “if you can only see the violence but not the “overwhelming beauty of folks exercising their First (not Second in this case ) Amendment , then you have some cognitive reframing to do”? It is you dear lady who sound like you are a paid demonstrator who thinks that it fine to destroy even minority owned businesses as was done in our city on May 31st. You dear lady are the one who has some “cognitive reframing” to do. You sound like you are a member of ANTIFA or a paid demonstrator. This is my 1st post on this site I didn’t want to go into this but am only rebutting your post.. I so admire Dr. Amen and I thought this site was to talk about about the stress of being in lock down mode and not to push your political agenda.

    Comment by JOAN — July 13, 2020 @ 2:21 PM

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